XXX Racing-AthletiCo had George, Brandon, Soren, Julian, and newbee cat 3 yours truly in Sunday's criterium.
Not to be mistaken for a seasoned cat 3 rider, I started slow and head butted the accordion effect 8 times per lap while the rest of the boys played it smart in the top 15. After Soren made a few attempts at organizing a break and/or sneaking off the front, I finally moved from the last position and started some front of the group antics. In short order I was off the front for a stoopid 2 lap flyer with a good 40 minutes of racing remaining. The pack was more than happy to let me sit out there and waste myself away.
Matches lit, burnt and discarded in short order, I spent the rest of the race licking my wounds at the back of the pack, being a non factor in the rest of the race. This left me time to watch the fireworks at the front (which included some nice covers by Brandon).
George placed the best of us at 11th. They had the camera turned off by the time I rolled through, so I placed somewhere between 22nd and 37th. The winning move happened to be a strong attack after a late race prime. Go figure.
Post race the teammates tried to get me to raise my right hand and taken an oath against the stoopid flyer, but I resisted with a smattering of excuses, including, but not necessarily limited to the following:
1. I thought the race was 34 minutes plus one lap!
2. I wasn't going all out -- just testing the legs and the new wheels.
3. But the announcer mentioned my name!
4. I would have won if the pack was led off course.
5. You mean there's no "most aggressive rider" category?!
6. I wasn't trying to make a solo move, but my jump is just too freaking intense.
7. I thought for sure someone would bridge up to me and we'd ride off to glory.
8. But it was a good workout!